I've never had a Christmas like the one I've just enjoyed. By far the best Christmas of my adult life. Different to that warm excited feeling you have as a child on Christmas morning. Different because for my first Christmas ever I wasn't thinking of myself. How much more real of a Christmas it was.

To start though I should tell you a little about where I am. I am in a small country with a population of 46 million people. I am in a country that has endured Civil war for the past 4 decades, a majority of the population has only ever lived with fear and unrest. I am in a country with the 3rd highest population of internally displaced people, third to the Sudan and The Congo.

The effect on the children of this country has been devastating. In the last 10 years 700,000 children have been displaced. 6.5 million children live below the povery line. Children suffer disproportionately from limited or lack of access to housing, healthcare, humanitarian aid and education. Of the 12 children that die daily, 5 are murdered and 1 commits suicide. 1 child is kidnapped every day. Around a quarter of the paramilitary and guerrilla fighters are children and young people who may have been forcibly recruited or see joining the conflict as an escape route from widespread rural poverty. (Sources : UNICEF and MSF:Doctors Without Borders).

These are the children I lived with for the past 6 weeks. I was priveledged to visit their houses, experience their poverty first hand, and hear their devastating tales.

These were the children that you blessed with a Merry Christmas.

I know 4 siblings who dont have much to eat. I know because I stayed with them for 4 days. They eat a bowl of rice each meal, with an occassional pinky finger size portion of protein. They are hungry because their father spends their money on alcohol, and when he has finished he arrives home with a heavy fist. That is to word it nicely.

I know a 12 year old girl who just finished her last year of schooling. Following in her older sisters footsteps she will now persue a lifetime of prostitution.

The stories sicken me as much as they do you. Even more so because I know their smiling faces. I am baffeled at this sinful world. I only tell you all this so that you know who your contributions went to. I only tell you this so that when you look at the photos you dont just see groups of smiling children, but you understand that under those smiles are devastated hearts. Devastated lives.

Through Gods goodness their has been one small saving grace. My auntie followed me here 2 years ago, and sickened by the conditions she joined an organisation called Musica Esperanza, which aims to give impoverished children an outlet through music and dance.

I thought it was a little trivial, as you might, until I witnessed the benefits. These are children scared to go home, or children who have nothing to go home to. These are children who pick up a clarinet or a trumpet, whilst thousands of children in their country are carrying a gun. The passion they produce through their instuments and their voices is something I have never really experienced.

They have a choir of 40 children, who practice 12 hours a week after school. They are all dedicated, and most talented. If they only had the opportunity to shine their talent in the Western World they would ALL be vastly successful.

So Christmas...

The nuns woke up at 2am to finish cooking the rice they had been cooking for 2 days for 350 people. The Musica Esperanza children came with us on a bus to a town called Cartago, where we were to give a concert to a refuge run by a nun. More a saint.

The refuge in Cartago is an indescribable place, and I really dont think I have room here to describe it. It is definetely a different story, probably a different book. It is by far the hardest of places I have ever seen. It is home to 300 street people, run by just one nun (Clarita right). A majority of the residents are crippled or bedridden.

We delivered food to the 300 people as the choir and band set up. A man to my left lay on the ground, crippled, cupping handfuls of rice to his mouth. I hate to use the description, but he fed himself much like a dog might. The rest of the residents, crippled and hurting, came stumbling out of their rooms to join us in a courtyard.

The choir started, and as their angelic voices filled the hurting refuge, tears flowed from each childs' eyes. And from our eyes too. Tears of compassion, sadness and joy. Joy that we could give a gift first hand that noone else was there to give.

I was amazed that children who live in unbearable circumstances, children who we should all be crying for, were able to shed tears for others. Were able to look at the plight of others and appreciate their fortune, as infortunate as they are themselves.

Compare that to a child in the West who only thinks of the playstation he is going to recieve on Christmas morning, and I dont quite know what to say.

That night the choir and some other children delievered a play on the birth of Jesus, it was very special.

And then finally for the presents. The contributions you made went to buy blankets for 200 children, a ball to each boy, some girly stuff to each girl, and a couple of t-shirts to each child. Enough money was left to feed each member of their family that night.

I was pretty disappointed at the prospect of buying blankets for children. How boring. Kids back home would cry. But it is winter, it is cold, and many of the children sleep cold. Practicality won, even though I would have preferred more toys.

But to see the joy on their faces was unforgettable. Kids that never recieve presents, who otherwise would have been at home experiencing a very cold Christmas. They hugged their blanket with joy, and on my visits to their houses the following day I saw the blankets spread on their beds. And I saw them all playing with their soccer/basket balls all the following week.

I dont quite know what more to say. It was incredible, I've never had a Christmas where I have cried and laughed so much. I'd like to give credit to the Bethlamita nuns, who work tirelessley day in and day out living life with these kids. 100% dedicated to the children they serve they are an incredible foursome.

To those who contributed, thankyou for your generosity. Thankyou for looking past yourselves this Christmas. Thankyou for trusting me with your money. For about $10 per child we put smiles on 200 kids faces, and filled their bellies with some food on Christmas day. May God bless you for this act of compassion and grace.